回忆Kiyumena

人生在世不过沧海一粟，珍贵的生命对于浩邈的宇宙而言无异于弹指一挥。人类用不到地球历史三十分之一的时间创造了惊世骇俗的种种奇迹，并且在以一种深刻而无所不及的方式改变着这个我们赖以生存和发展的家园。也许人类注定要为自己的归宿负部分的责任。

我自从来到这个生机无限的蓝色星球，就亲眼目睹了后工业时代带给人们生活方式、社会理念、价值取向等诸多方面的深刻冲击。但十七年的生活经历告诉我：这个世界并不是由数字支配的机器和机器般冷漠的人们主宰的；它理应由有血有肉、有情有义的活生生的人构成绝对主体。

回眸我十几年的心路历程，懵懂无知的少年时期曾带给我无尽的悔恨——我曾是那样执著地追求于所爱，一如我对蕴藏着深邃奥秘的大自然之痴迷……然而，一次所谓的“失败”竟让我捏着绝望与自弃的鸩酒之杯醉复醒，醒复醉。虽然也曾以“如烟往事俱忘却，心底无私天地宽”来慰藉一颗总是因为多情而受伤的心，可是有些人、有些事却是那般刻骨铭心，岂是轻易所能淡忘？诚如元稹所叹：“曾经沧海难为水，除却巫山不是云”……

不错，她是我中学时代开始时最痴迷的人，也是我中学时代结束时最依恋的人——

虽然，这只是一种无望的单相思。

如同守望月宫中的嫦娥能来赴一场人间的相聚，美好然而虚幻。我曾不止一次问过自己：她何以如此地吸引你，令你如着魔般魂不守舍，不能自拔？美貌？才学？颖慧？气质？……最后却总是在满脑子她的浅淡笑靥与温文吐属之中沉沉睡去，睡得很香，很香……

后来，我终于发现了解脱的“灵丹妙药”：“两眼不见心上人，一心只读圣贤书。”这是一种痛苦的煎熬——正如梭罗在思念不能相见的挚爱的女友时所悲叹的：“爱情是不可救药的，唯有爱之弥甚之一法耳！”……于是，我开始试图寻找能“代替”（荒唐！她岂是有人可以代替以万一的？！）她的人，以倾注我一腔的热情；但，“借酒浇愁愁更愁”，此时正是“借相思浇相思更相思”了！

……

最后，面临着名誉扫地的威胁，我终于决定“力戒相思之情”，好好学习，天天向上。不知是否因此感动了苍天，以至降予我一份清华录取通知书（虽然明知考取清华殊非幸致）？当一切尘埃落定之后，向前一望，——她，就在最高点，朝我嫣然一笑……

惊奇？不，是惊，更是喜！也许有人仍然用多年前那份拙劣而幼稚的“情书”来充当谈资与笑料；但此时，我脑中涌现出的是贾宝玉的不刊之论：“女儿是水做的骨肉；我见了女儿便清爽……女儿乃天地山川精华之所钟，……真真是无价之宝！”——岂其不然！其德温润，其品谦和；其才渊博，其识明达；天资聪慧，举止娴雅；思悟有道，谈吐成韵……秀外慧中，世所罕见！——此非某溢美之词，确系其人之实也。

Kiyumena，今天我们有缘，能够再度相约清华。值此金风初起、夏荷未凋之际，我诚挚地祝愿你、也祝愿我能永葆真纯之心、温润之品！有如古语所云：“惟大英雄能本色，是真名士自风流！”愿祈苍穹，恭叩，恭叩……

谢亦萧

2006.8.8(丙戌年立秋翌日) 于 江南轩

Justyre

Aug 8th, 2006 at Pavilion of Southwaters

Second Things Second

Since my failure to find proper methods to circumvent the GFW in the past few months, it has taken me a great deal of efforts to manage the establishment of a talking place here at Blogspot...Gratefully, this problem no longer exists, at least for now.

Well, I am not quite sure what to look for in an actual personal blog, in terms of what to see, what to tell, or what to discuss. Three years ago I had my first experience with some analog of 'blog' at an SNS website dedicated to Chinese college students. It was not long before I found out that it functions through strict control of the users' thoughts by means of 'no banned terms allowed' and things like that. I have been having the wish to escape since.

The politics of any country in this world is sort of confusing and an immense machinery through which the life of millions of people are affected. The very foundation of a sustainable, or 'supported', form of politics should, in my view, be willing to undertake the public appeals as its primary mission. This is much easier said than done.

Now, I would like to give a somewhat big picture of the development of this blog. There should be several language blocks, definitely, such as Chinese, English, Japanese, and plausibly Korean. As for science and arts, the blocks will be introduced when necessary.

To conclude, I am a Chinese youngster and is currently after my dream to transform my specialized field. It's gonna be tough, I understand, but till now no obstacles have changed my mind even a bit. I am striving for the big dream--a personal one--of creating one of the coziest homes in the world, with my beloved.

First Things First

Dear friends,

Welcome to my blog here.

Before introducing this place, I have a few complaints to make. I feel so sorry that when my first post here was almost done, the omnipresent GFW came to sight and cut away what I had written by a slash...as a consequence, I have made up my mind to write offline and then paste to post so as to ensure that my work does not simply end up in vain.

Well, now I'd like to explain why I have chosen this Google service as my gathering room of essays, ideas and thoughts. My life with some analog of 'blogs' actually started much earlier, that is around three years ago, with an SNS website in China for college students to share information and socialize. I once considered this to be an adequate place for blogging; however, it was not long before I found that the control over freedom of expression is tough, mostly by means of regulating a pool of 'sensitive words' that mustn't be present in any written stuffs. There was a period when 'Mao Zedong'(Chairman Mao) was considered 'sensitive'...and I feel confined and slowly going insane, so escape seems to be the best choice.

Here I shall plan the structure of my blog. There should definitely be language and culture sections, such as Chinese, English, Japanese, and plausibly Korean. Meanwhile, some sorts of science and arts sections may sequentially come to existence when necessary.

The two core words for my idea in the construction of this space are 'truth' and 'thought'. I hope you will feel free to talk about anything I am posting here.

Thank you for reading this.

Justyre,

Oct 4th, 2009, at Cab of Justyre

P.S. The four Chinese words in the banner picture means: FREEDOM, SERENITY, EQUALITY, MAGNANIMITY.